Killing Me Slowly
by Kiko Shoujo
Summary: Usagi is diagnosed with depression and Tokumori is in pain because of his denied love for Yukari. When blood boils and souls are divided between love and duty will all come out well or will someone be left in their angst and pain. A different kind of cr


Disclaimer: I do not own Sailormoon or Paradise Kiss, but no one writes fics about Paradise Kiss so I thought I'd throw that in to make it more dramatic. Also, I might put myself in the story, but only in a small part and under a different name.

Note: I will be using the Japanese names of the Sailormoon characters, but all of the other names will be in English, unless I change my mind. And this story is set some time after the end of StarS, estimating that the end of StarS is about the same time (withen a year) of the middle of Paradise Kiss. Also I'm not sure how old Usagi is at the end StarS, but I'm going to put it at 18 and Mamoru at 22, since he is going to Harvard. Also, do not kill me if I mix up something in either series. I only have Sailormoon StarS and Paradise Kiss 1,2, and 4 (I can't find my copies of 3 and 5, but I think my friend stole them). I also have foot notes at the bottom of the page for words marked with an . and seeing as fanfiction won't let me use asterisk, I have to use the word "space" multiple times to let you know that I'm moving on to th next section.

"Life sucks..."

The girl sits there on her bed with all thought pushed aside and thinks nothing but about her awful life. She let's her blonde hair fall around her shoulders, and begins playing with a loose strand.

"So limp..."

Absent mindedly she hums a vague, but recognizeable tune.

"...she is the one named Sailor Moon..."

When she realizes what she's doing, she quickly stops herself. Her sadness deepens as she thinks about her role in the universe.

"Silly me. Why do I do it? All the time it is the same nonsense, the same as it always was, the same as it always will be. Everything is always going to be in chaos. Everyone goes about their daily lives as though it all just happens, in a time standstill"

There is a faint ring in the hallway and she stands to get it, but her raven haired lover gets it first.

"Usagi, you go rest now. You're not well and I wish you would take your medicine. It'll help with your depression."

"Why Mamoru, I'm not sick," she sneers, "Why? Are you ashamed of me?"

"You know I'm not, and to prove it, I'll invite Rei and Ami over for dinner tomorrow night. You haven't seen them in a while, have you?"

"I saw them yesterday when some punks were robbing a Walgreens."

"But did you talk to them?"

"Why does it matter? I see them too often anyway."

"They're you your friends, you can't possibly see them too often."

"I see them every goddamn night!"

"But aren't they your friends?"

"I DON'T KNOW!!!"

A blanket of silence covered the room until nothing but a faint calling could be heard through the phone.

"Mamoru, Usagi? Somebody pick up the phone dammit!"

Mamoru went into the other room to talk to the caller. Usagi went to the drab little room of their apartment. Her face red from anger, she takes some foundation and begins layering it on, trying to cover the red, with little success.

"Come on, dammit!"

She throws the little jar of foundation at the mirror which leaves a long, snaking line across the surface. She sinks to the floor sobbing and rocking back and forth. Mamoru comes in and holds her, but she doesn't respond to him. He gets a glimpse of multiple scars on the flesh of her inner arm.

"Oh, Usagi..."

He trails off as though nothing else needed to be said, shouldn't be said. He slowly kissed her head assuring her that everything would be alright. He sat holding her, becoming as numb as the small huddle of smeared make up and blonde hair, holding her for eternity until sleep seized them both and when he awoke and looked at his love, he smiled, for she looked like nothing at all was wrong.

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"I'm not bloody going to class today and you can shove it up your arse for all I care"

"But Arashi isn't sick is he?"

"No, but he bloody doesn't want to go to school either"

"But will Miwako see Arashi after school at the studio?"

"Of course, George might stick another pair of scissors up my bum if I don't"

The pink-haired Yazawa Arts student left her blonde lover in his bed grumbling about someone named Hama and demon teachers. She bounced down the stairs and left for school on Sally, the vespa motorized scooter. Upon reaching her destination, she recognized a tall fellow with hair that matched his blue contacts and beside him, a person whose sexual orientation was hard to destinguish at first, because of the lilac ringlets that surround the face, but after a minute of looking, you could see that the person had an adam's apple and no breasts.

"George, Isabella!" screamed the girl.

The two men turned around, the one in drag ran and hugged the pink-haired girl. The other rapped up his conversation with another student and then walked up to the two hugging each other.

"Where's Arashi? He's coming to the studio this afternoon to help with the dress isn't he," said the blue-haired George, addressing Miwako, whose bouncing was cause her odango's to come loose. She stopped to fix them before answering.

"He didn't feel like coming, so Miwako came all alone. Who is that girl George is talking to? I thought George was dating Caroline?"

"I am dating Yukari, and I'm talking to a new student, who I wanted Arashi to meet since they have so much in common. Miwako, I'd like you to meet Miss Takeshi Yakumoto."

Once said, a girl of about 17 stepped forward and introduced herself. She had large, short, candy-red ringlets with faded blue tips, all of which was peaking through an oversized teddy cap complete with ears and little button eyes and nose. tripped T-shirt said "I bite," with a pair of fangs beneath the words. Her skirt was obviousely hand made with rips and tears, that were strategically placed to allow some skin but not look slutty. Over her fishnets, she wore large furry leg warmers over a pair of beat-up mary janes. The corner of her lip was pierced and sporting a silver hoop, as well as three lobe piercings, two cartilage piercings on each ear and a tiny scar were an eyebrow piercing and a nose stud had once been. When she saw that the other girl was looking she explained.

"I got my nose and eyebrow pierced, but I didn't like it, so I let the hole close."

"Isn't Takeshi a boys name?"

"Yeah, that's why I go by Nako."

George butt in, "Nako's from the USA and she's looking for a group to join so I think she should join us."

"Yay! Welcome aboard Nako!"

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"I can't take another test!"

Elsewhere in Tokyo, an ebony haired girl runs down the street, trying to make it to her modelling job. Behind her runs a tall ebony haired boy who is trying to catch up with her. Both pass by a sulking, odango sporting blonde girl who ignores the other girl, but is captured, by the boy's physique and over all familiarity.

"Yukari, you left your test results!"

"Tokumori?"

She stops abruptly and thanks the boy for his kindness and runs off again. He stands in her wake, as she moves farther in the distance, thinking of old times, when a sadness comes over him.

"I really need to get over her."

"Excuse me.."

He turns around to find the blonde staring at him sheepishly.

"Hi, I was just wondering if that was your girlfriend."

"Umm..."

He had feelings for Yukari, the girl who he had learned to love even though she herself was on the brink of love, fame, and fortune. However, he couldn't keep holding on to her, so he told the truth.

"...no she's not my girlfriend, just a friend from school."

Now that he got a chance to look at her, he saw that she was a very pretty girl and quite dateable if you ignore the fact that she looks like an old lady, but couldn't possibly be older than 18. Was she considering a relationship between them?

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"Stupid stupid stupid..."

It was playing back and forth in her mind. For some reason, the blonde had feelings for this guy, and she only met him 5 minutes ago, not to mention that she has her own raven-haired lover and husband waiting back at their apartment.

"Nevermind, forget that I even asked the question."

"Here, take my number...for just in case."

He handed her a slip of folded up paper and stood back. It read "Hiroyuki Tokumori's cell # # # - # # # #.

"Uhh, thanks."

He smiled and headed back toward Seiei Acadamy

"I can't believe I did that.."

The blonde, out of breath and shaking leaned against a wall.

"...What am I going to do...?"

End Chapter One

Odango- a pair of buns that are worn on top of the head. Sailormoon wears them.

Caroline- one of Yukari's nicknames.

That was fun! This is my first fic in a really long time and I worked so hard on it and it is only THE FIRST CHAPTER!!! I also wrote Making Rini about a year ago, so if you like a little slapstick action, you should read it. And please review, I can always use some healthy criticizum. And please, READ THE NEXT CHAPTER WHEN IT COMES OUT!!!


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